The Myth of Summer as an Adult

Cognitive dissonance is a theory that describes the discomfort that occurs when a person's beliefs, attitudes, or behaviors are inconsistent. This discomfort can lead people to try to reduce the inconsistency, which can manifest in a variety of ways.  I am taking some liberty with this definition as I reflect on summer

As a child, summer meant NO SCHOOL and endless play, camps, staying up late, freedom and no homework.  For so many reasons this mentality has stuck in my brain the minute June rolls around. I tell myself, there will be freedom, play, no school (well, at least that is right), and endless games.  In reality, I am a grownup with a job, family and continued responsibilities.  My beliefs about summer often contradict my realities, sometimes leading disappointment.  I have been an adult for much longer than I have been a child and yet it is always surprising what sticks.  Learning how to cope and manage when our wants and desires (attitudes) do not match up with our realities (behaviors) can often feel overwhelming and sometimes lead to sadness.  When I work with clients, I want to give them space to respect and acknowledge and accept these feelings.  We have a right to sit with the feelings of dissonance no matter the circumstance.  The challenges are how to adapt our perspective to match our reality in a way that may not create disappointment.  As an adult, what are the positives of our current realities?  Changing our perspective on a situation can give it a whole new meaning and often help us feel calmer and maybe more optimistic about the spaces we currently occupy.  Instead of looking at what we are missing out on, we can try and look at what we have.

Maybe for now the best I can do is accept that even as an adult summers looks different, but I am still allowed to eat popsicles and chase fireflies.